The gromits of suburb Paris think 'bad' equals burning cars. Today, as I approached my train station for a quick run into Paris, I noted a burned garbage can. The gray plastic mini dumpster had been melted to a meer bassin with wheels.

I'm on the upswing from my cold. Yesterday's nap and long night sleep helped quite a bit.

Its been very tiring lately. I am exhausted and the heat of the sun hasn't been too helpful. In addition, nature saw fit to strike me with a timely cold and sore throat. I'm dealing with it all as graciously as possible. I have one week to recover.

I am beginning to anticipate our 10 day stint in Chelles. There is always an extra bit of energy that surges through the team when we work to invite an entire city to a Gospel concert. This time round, I am more excited to see how things have changed in the world of evangelism since I was last involved in a summer mission. We've been working hard on organization of the music, and others, like my roommate are planning the training of the entire team of 40 people.

Even with this new adrenaline pumping, I feel a personal frustration with language. I don't hear it much at home and only seem to speak it when I am outside the house which is considerably less in the last month. They say learning a language is like climbing a mountain: first, you go up and its super tough but exciting cuz you can see your progress. Then you climb along a flat place that is so dry and hot and, in my case, sun scorched; you can't see too well where you've been nor where you are going; in fact- you feel more like you're doing worse than you were a few steps previous.

Add a few wet tears to the already running nose, a homesick lump in the throat and cracked dry lips and you've got a pretty clear picture of life for the moment...and thank God, its just for the moment.

The much needed vacation behind me, I was greeted by a swift sore throat and cold this morning. There is much work to do in preparation for the week in Chelles but I need to rest.

One highlight from the trip to Nice: Adrienne and I spent the first day in a town called Juan Les Pins, just one stop east of Cannes. We shopped and found our very own spot on a sandy beach, swam in the Mediteranean, dried off, swam again and dried off again. Then for dinner at about 8pm, we targeted a pizzeria on the beach. We sat about 20 feet from the waves, wiggled our toes in the sand and ate amazing pizza's in the "palm tree and sunset sky". This town is my recommendation to any person desirous of a little 'repos'.

A little work, a little play. Every summer that was the theme. I had to weed one row of the garden and I could play the afternoon. Its been a busy spring time with language learning, church ministry and summer ministry preparation. Tomorrow I get to take off and rest for a couple days. I'll be back on Thursday. The sun of the riviera is calling and heaven knows, I need it! This will be my first visit to Nice.

there's a first time for everything

I don't remember my first word, or my first step, but I do remember my first piano recital on that clanky piano at Elk Plain so many years ago with Wanda Fisher so proud of us students. My hands sweat so hard that I thought the piano would melt.

I had my first solo flight into Paris back in February. It was freezing cold and because the Russian president was in town they had closed half of the métro line I needed and so I ended up walking the Champs d'Elysées. Yesterday I experienced my first Fête de la Musique. I have been rehearsing with a group from Noisy Champs for over a month. We took to the stage and played our best renditions of Negro Spirituals. It was quite an experience and I did enjoy myself although I never thought of myself as a gospel accompanist. We took to the city after our little show and I joined thousands of Parisiens and tourists at République for a fantastic show of live music and people. There was a sea of people pouring out of the streets, from the main square, and the métros.

This morning I set out on my next first time adventure. Katie and I jumped in the bus to head for church, my first solo flight. I was able to sucessfully manoeuver the desiel manual transmission, 9 passanger van from our "hill" driveway and out the gate. We then discovered we needed to buy fuel. So I bought desiel for the first time here in France- no problem! We headed off and took the scenic route to church. This means that I missed our exit for one freeway and ended up on another where I had to pay a toll to get myself turned back around. The freeways in Paris run in circles and I've been all mixed up since arriving here but I think, after the solo flight today, I have it straightened out- at least in my head.

We were only 45 minutes late for the practice! It was Katie's first day to play at church with us. She did great.

This weekend will be one of the busiest I've seen in a long time. I've been recruited to be a part of a group that will perform with so many other groups across France during their National Fête de Musique. It should be interesting. I do have a long day ahead of me. Thus, beauty sleep is a must.

I'm not an English teacher but I am considered a native speaker here by some. Tuesday I went to work with my roommate, Audrey. Audrey is an English teacher and I was her "show and tell" all day long. I met approximately 100 kids, told them all my name, where I was from, about my family and about Portland. I showed a little flick prepared by my talented friends in Portland, footage of the Pharmacy guys and Dept of Sk8boarding.

The toughest part of the whole day was speaking English only and not letting on that I understood any french. So many times I just wanted to break out in French, answer questions that were constantly being syphoned through Audrey. Amongst these restless Jr. Highers I discovered a few skaters. One moment in particular was tough for me. I hear a little dude say he wished those guys would come to France and skate with him and his friends. I wanted to say, "Yeah, that's a great idea. I'll call them up and ask them if they'd do that." Each class time I saw so many eyes looking at me wondering what I was, excited to tell me what little English they could. Many talked about musicians and had picked photos of their heros to show me. I saw huge trends toward popular music and musicians who were my own age: one woman killed a few years back in a plane accident- the girl said that she would live on in her heart.

Crazy that girls my age are making millions singing and dressing in hardly anything and changing the lives of some Jr highers all over the world. I ask what kind of impact I make. These women and men may pass just as quickly as the New Kids on the Block, but can I keep going and leave even a bigger legacy? I guess its not so much me who wants the legacy- but I desire a life that counts for more than just a pile of money or fame. My life is filled right now with the hunt for where I can continue to discover a life that is counting for something on this earth.

Ok. I have much to say but it will have to wait til tomorrow. I did update my photo albums at ImageStation. Make sure to look toward the bottom of the page where it offers you to look at my other albums.

Thanks Jonathan for blogging even when you wanted to protect your eyes from the harmful screen rays. I'm snagging your link to Global360. There is just too much cool stuff there.

I didn't stare blankly at the page you should click on above. Instead I pondered where I have been in relation to where I am today. Less than 6 months ago I would never have stumbled onto a blog page or a site like YWAM's and followed links around like a child chasing spilled cheerios. Today I read through people's thoughts on missions, what it is like to be a Christian in their world, be it India, China, Austrailia, UK, or good ol' US of A. Why do I so desperately want to know what they are doing?

For some reason the world seems smaller from over here in Paris. Maybe I see more cultures represented on a daily basis. I'm in a constant struggle to learn to live in another culture, speak another language, and love the people like Jesus loves them. I'm deciding that even though this country has so few Christians, it is just like the US in that Christians exist, they want to love God and worship Him with all their being, and my job is to love them, stand by that flame, and testify to its beauty- praying for its growth and all the while knowing I'm weak, a "foot washer", and leaning on Christ for grace in all the mistakes I'm bound to make.

"ÇA VA?!!!!!!" I was woken again this afternoon from my nap by the return of M. Surf. The ride is up and running again and the music has started again. I guess I'll give him a break today since its Father's Day. It feels like its been an extremely long day so far but the evening is quickly approaching...too bad I took a nap. Now I'll be up til late hours. But that works fine for me, cuz I need to call my Dad and tell him how much I love him...

For the last two nights, the citizens of Lognes have been partying in our backyard until about midnight. Loud music pulsates from little kiddy rides and bumper cars. Madonna screams out her popular hits from a ride called Miami Surf, which tosses it's crazed fanatics around in a large circle. They board the "Surf" and choose one of the 20 seats all lined up in a row. Then a large padded bar gently settles in their laps and the megga board takes off clockwise with a yell from the conductor. "Ça va?" he yells. "Ça va!" and then he sends the ride flying counterclockwise. One particular girl's hair is quite a site as it flies around in circles. It just shows how much more violent the ride is than it looks. "Laissez tout!" and all the hands go in the air! This seemed to be the popular ride for the teenagers. For now- I'm glad they turned off Madonna and the Surf conductor has turned down his lights and smoke and strobes. I will sleep in relative peace...until tomorrow night.

Love/Hate
Why do I have such a love/hate relationship with change? I love change. I think everybody should be looking for change. I think change is great. In fact, I have even taken it so far as to say that "change = learning". If I'm not changing, then I'm not really learning. Learning is a sign of growth. "The minute you stop learning, you stop growing." "Our greatest fear in life is getting 'stuck'." Its a thought of progress, movement, forward action. Its deeper than just memorizing, regurgitation on some exam; it's personalizing, transforming, making me someone I wasn't before. Some have called this developmentalism (thanks Dr. Patty). Its more than a romanticized exploration of self and environment; more than facts and memory tricks, more than discussion with people and theorizing, and more than a 'pavlovization' by culture, teachers, parents and profs. Some of the coolest stories come from people who tell how they were and how they are changed.

I hate change. It means passing from comfort to uncomfort. It means stripping me from "me" and replacing it with new. It means humiliation and an almost seemingly hypocrisy. Its saying one thing and then later, a transformation of thought that comes out saying the opposite. It feels fickle. It makes one eat humility. It means being weak when we had always thought ourselves strong. Its painful to change. It means mistakes, retries, and 'brain smoke'. It makes one tired, a forced battle with self.

I tried to imagine the world full of changing people. Everyone was focused on expanding their reservoir of knowledge from a learner's point of view. People content in their humility and weakness- seeking the better, stronger way but never flanting strength.

Today I had some RUG time with my friends Katie and MaryBeth. It was so awesome to pray together for people we know and love, for ourselves and for France. We praised God for His creation and His love. The more we prayed to Him, the more we were overcome with this Yahweh. It makes me feel small- a good place to be!

Today Audrey brought a few students over to make American Chocolate Chip Cookies with real live Americans. We had a blast. Check the photo link for a new album called Les Français, where you will see picturess from the event! They had a blast and so did we. They made some of the best cookies I have ever tasted...but they were being coached by the pros!

Church Picnics
I remember fondly the little church picnics which were hosted annually at Elk Plain Community Church in Spanaway, Washington. There were always two events that I looked forward to: 1. Watching a crew of adults sing a rhythm of crazy phrases and act them out (my favorite line was "Hark, a lark, flying through the park- splat!" and my second favorite was "Give Betsy give, the baby's gotta live!"). The second and most coveted of all activities was the lawnmower race. Steve Fisher and Mike Sherman would always show up with their souped up mowers, ready to mow down any person fending for their championship. My personal favorite activity: the log they suspended above a pile of hay where two kids would get on it like a horse and beat eachother with pillows, trying to knock the other off. Sorry- its a bit violent but that's how I grew up.

Today I went to another church picnic. They say the weather always is nice and today it proved so again with record heat in the 30's. (celsius!!) All the churches in the Paris region association gathered to eat and play and hang out together. There were soccor games, water fights, basketball and kids activities. I took advantage of the sun and mostly layed around, entertaining a few conversations here and there with friends. I was so encouraged to talk with one friend who is moving soon to Austrailia. Our question of the day: Why do we have to keep re-learning to trust God for our lives? It would be so much easier if we could learn it once and have it over with.

I was walking along on the sidewalk in Noisiel today reading yesterday's calender verse and comments. More than the content of the little piece of paper, I realized I was walking through a French town who had a church growing in it. Elise had just commented that people came to a book stand presented by the church there in a market to ask questions. My mind took a quick side-trip to a town I visited 3 days ago with Jonathan and Chris: Chelles. We had made a visit to the skatepark there. Chelles is without a church.

I just read through a little article associated with Answers in Genesis. They interviewed a french scientist and I found what he had to say worthy of thinking about.

Voila! After a few weeks of a blank, uneditable template chez Blogger, I have changed my template completely and "think" that I have remembered all the usual linkage and then some. Hopefully they won't cause me such douleur next time.

I've got a new roommate. The OIKOS house grows and we are two americans and a french gal now. Lucky Michelle is on a long weekend to Bordeaux, but I am happy for her nonetheless. Audrey and I shared dinner and chatted tonight, mostly in French. What a cool addition to our house.

Today I went to airport to drop off one friend; tomorrow we greet another. Katie is coming from New York and brings another music instrument to the house: her viola. She is staying for 6 weeks. We'll be working together on this summer's worship times.

I can't leave tonights blog without mentioning some certainly very cool people, Lorenzo and Marie-Alice. We were sitting in day one of L'Eglise en Devenir (Emerging Church conf.) when they were presented. A young couple with two small children, and ministry in a fashion that caught my attention: Pays Basque, Surf, Snowboard, only 2 churches, camps, students. I tried to control myself as Marie-Alice spoke about her everyday life being where she lived her faith. My heart resonated with her words and I was able to briefly speak with her after their presentation. As far as I'm concerned, these people are key and a definate link to where my heart is headed. Check them out.

I've just lived an incredible week and anticipate more incredible days to follow. The weather has been warm and humid and sometimes those showers and thunder. Things are a little calmer at the OIKOS now that the Emergent Church conference has passed through.

Although it's past and the calm is settling, it doesn't mean that the ideas and "ologies" that were discussed don't still hang thick in the air. My brain is busting with thoughts and dreams and every once in a while a conversation will dip into topics that are being tossed around from London to Prague and beyond. The second day of meetings came to the OIKOS in Lognes and Michelle and I prepared for about 40 people. It was incredible to have so many people, enthusiastic about their lives in Christ sitting in our living room. The resonating theme of day 2: the kingdom of god is a house full of poor people partying. Everyone is talking about it.

For me though, I was swept away with Andrew Jones' comment on "Do this in rememberance of me." To set the stage: Jesus and his housefull of partying poor people, aka disciples, are hanging out together, talking, eating, sharing a bottle, or skin of wine and Jesus profoundly says, "Hey, do this in rememberance of me." Whatever this is, we ought to be doing it. Somewhere in my finite american brain a bell rang; whenever I hung out with friends and passed such awesome times together, we always would say, "Hey, we oughta do this more often!" Its a THIS.

jump around on my links to jonathan's and jonny's and andrew's and matt's blogs... you'll find not only more profound thoughts on our conference, but pictures as well.

Welcome to June. I've already got a head start on my tan! Paris has been hot this last week and now, its raining and staying warm. There is so much to talk about from the last couple days. But for now, I'll just say that I added some more pictures to my image station and anyone who likes to ride a skateboard should check it out... I'm starting my little collection of places in France!