All these few weeks that I have been here, J keeps talking about the "tallskinnykiwi" and how he keeps tabs on this emergent thinker. One weekend before I left the States, my friend Alissa told me about some guy's blog and that I should check it out. She scribbled the link on a small piece of paper that happened to make it to France in all my little things and I discovered that it was the very same "tallskinnykiwi"...


I'm going through a strange period of time where I am assimilating the fact that I live here now. I've always struggled with where I'm really from. Sometimes I say from Graham, sometimes its "near Seattle" and more often now its "Portland". I persist in the thinking that I am an "alien" just passing through this earth but other times I talk about home as being the states. But every day now I walk over the same cobblestones, up and down the same stairs, board the RER in the same car so that I'll be descending near my exit tunnel, walk past the same chocolatier on the corner of "my left turn" and Avenue Friedland. For some reason, I hear Janel's voice echoing somewhere in the dust of 4 years ago, "I can't believe I live here!" For me, it has a new ring than it did back in the Alps. this time its for a longer period of time. I have some ministry and skill goals and dreams for future ministry here. Somewhere between the clutch and the shifting I'll get to that point of knowing where what is...


J has arrived at a conclusion that fits him well. France is his home, he pursues french citizenship, it is where his life is. For me, I'm somewhere between calling the States my home and France my home. I am where I am for now. But there is an uncertainty as to my "permanent" existance here. Maybe that is why I can't make the jump. I guess I'll just be an alien for another few years.